Rules for Determining Eligibility in the JG Dead Pool

  • All entries must be celebrities. Your Great Aunt Jenny doesn't count. Neither would, say, former Scottsdale mayor Herb Drinkwater (keep hanging in there, Herb! -too late). Former New York mayor Ed Koch would. A good rule of thumb is that if Ed Koch died, you'd hear about it in Scottsdale, but if (when) Herb Drinkwater died, you wouldn't hear about it outside Arizona. This may sometimes lead to gray areas, which will be decided in typically autocratic fashion by your moderator, me. The only entry in 1997 that should have been disallowed was MattS's entry of Joe Torre's brother, Frank. I don't know how I let him argue that one in. If you're not sure, try to remember that Frank Torre isn't a celebrity. The only entries for 98 that shoulda been disallowed were Marvin Zindler and Ellie Nesler. Everyone selected in the 1999 pool was acceptable. See below for the fair (fair in that it is outlined ahead of time and will be applied to everybody) process for determining celebrity status.

  • Animals are not allowed. That would rule out Cheetah, who is alive and well at age 55 in a Florida zoo. This will also help avoid repeating the nasty Spud's McKenzie standin controversy that so mired the 89 pool.

  • Concepts are not allowed. Sorry, no entries of disco, communism, the Republican Revolution, UNIX, the NFC East, Indian gaming or the world's computing infrastructure will be accepted.

  • People on death row are not eligible. Sorry, no Timothy McVeigh. Likewise, people charged with capital crimes are ineligible (Terry Nichols). Murderers who've gotten away (OJ Simpson) are eligible. Murderers still skirting justice (Jerrod Mustaf, the Ramsays) are eligible. Murderers not sentenced to death (Charles "Chuckie Poo" Manson) are eligible as well. Run-of-the-mill murderers don't count either. Manson certainly crosses the threshhold of celebrity. I hope that covers everything.

    New for 2k:

  • No Nazi War Criminals I really don't want to bother trying to ascertain what degree of criminality transforms one from retired autoworker to celeb, so I'm disallowing the lot of 'em.

  • No Porn Stars. While some porn stars may have achieved enough crossover fame to be considered celebrities, most have not. To avoid any arguments, I am therefor forbidding the wholesale conscription of AIDS-ridden junkies passed off as celebrities. (The Queen Mother notwithstanding.)

  • No illness/dying celebs That is, someone whose claim to fame IS their illness or dying. Examples would include the Muscular Dystrophy poster children, a previously unaccomplished writer who writes about their brave battle with cancer, lots of jocks' dying kids, and medical researchers bitten by their monkeys. This list is not to be taken as all-inclusive, tho it should give you a good basis for your expectations. This rule also covers people who are not famous for anything save being members of a suicide cult, etc.

  • No "Jeanne Calment"s. That is, someone whose only claim to being a celebrity is being old. (Sarah Delaney comes close in the 98 pool, but I let it stand. Tho her being old may have contributed to the popularity of her work it did not constitute the body of her accomplishment ala JC.) Whereas Jeanne Calment may have legitimately been called a celebrity due to her fame, it would be tough to draw the line at, say, the second oldest etc.. Marjory Stoneman Douglas was primarily known for being older than dirt in her later years but was sufficiently accomplished in her earlier years (before most of us were born) to justify eligibility.

    These examples are offered to hopefully provide you some reference points for deciding on celebrities. The final decision will be made at the draft. You have 15 seconds to plead your case, at which time, the moderator (me, who is admittedly also a contestant) will decide. Your entry is consent to this arbitration method.

    You can always put someone on your list if you're not sure. No penalty for JG striking down a putative pick. You still get to pick that round.

  • All entries must be alive at the start of the year. Not as easy as it sounds. Hopefully, with ample lead time, 2000's crop will all be fogging the mirror on Jan 1. (alas, this was not so for the 97, 98 & 99 pools) In the event of an unknown case (for example, Deng Xiaopeng was rumored dead for years), credit will only be given for an acknowledged death for the year in question. If for some reason an unreported death from a previous year affects those standings, suffice it to say that once the prize funds have been distributed, the results are final. If one of your picks dies after selection but before the beginning of the year, you may get a replacement pick within 48 hours. (This wasn't an issue for the 99 pool).

  • The Stephane Grappelli rule: Persons preregistering via a mailed draft list shall not be penalized should one of their picks die before the draft. The pick will be skipped (tho it's certainly a good idea to flag these ahead of time for me).

    Any attempt to squirm around the letter or intent of these rules will be met harshly and swiftly by JG whose decision, as always, supersedes these rules and is final.

    Last Modified 2/8/00

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